Month: July 2018

THE SANDBOX

The first nine similarities between toddlers and executives which I have presented describe many of traits which contribute to the success of executives. While there are some potential derailleurs in each Toddler/Executive similarity if not approached with intentionality, this last similarity, regarding collaboration, is a bit different in that there is more negative impacts than positive.

Think of a sandbox filled with toddlers. It has been observed that toddlers do not play with each other but rather alongside each other… often called parallel play. In a sandbox full of toddlers you can usually find them all playing in their own spot with a specific few toys working toward something of their own creation. The only time they really interact with each other is when one toddler has a toy another toddler wants or when one starts infringing on the space of one of their parallel players. Sound familiar? Sure it does.

Executives are driven people. What drives them differs greatly from person to person. For some it is a higher purpose… a calling if you will. For others it is power or money or fame. Regardless of the motive, this drive can create challenging dynamics when you introduce peers into the equation who have a similar drive for success.

Many of us have experienced one of the more obvious forms of the dysfunction that can arise between high powered Executives…the fabled turf war. Maybe we have experienced it as a bystander, a victim or even an enabler. These turf wars are not necessarily born out of a place of sheer divisiveness. It usually comes from two executives having objectives that are in some way opposed. For example, increasing sales volume to increase marketshare (often the target of a Vice President of Sales) may come of the cost profitability in the short term (often contrary to what a CFO wants to see). As the executives continue to push toward their objectives the friction between them and their organizations can intensify. Given the nature of the Executive and the strengths and skills that have gotten them to where they are, each is usually more prone to devise strategies to outwit their internal opponent in order to ensure achievement of their objective. In the end, they may achieve success for their division… an outcome that might not actually be best for the overall organization.

The alternative approach would be to look at the big picture, understand the perspectives of the various stakeholders in the organization and work toward a common objective that truly achieves the best results. This sounds well and good, however, in business we are measured by our ability to perform against a set of objectives and until we are rewarded for overall results and not our individual scope it is unlikely for this dysfunction to resolve itself. We can tackle this in another post on new approaches to performance management.

So with no “structural” solution in play, what to do?

For the Executive: Being the Executive of an organization or a division is tough. You have the dynamics of demanding stakeholders, aggressive, intelligent and driven peers and direct report organizations that do not fully understand your context. The pressure is great. Reverting to the sandbox mentality is a tempting way to reduce the complexity and draw a line on the sand…. “My objective is to be #1 in marketshare and we are going to achieve it… end of story.” The reward for such an achievement might be a promotion, maybe a keynote at a convention that gets you your next job… or maybe your organization goes out of business because it failed to be profitable or injured its reputation because the organization couldn’t handle the customer services on the back end of all those sales. Ultimately, the decision is yours. You may chose to hold to the pursuit of your objective but do not ignore the potential consequences. Ensure your are fully aware the impact to your objectives on your peer’s objectives and the risks to the organization. You can then make an educated decision. When challenged by your peers, you will at least be able to demonstrate an understanding of their context thereby increasing the credibility of your stance.

For those working with Executives: I have seen many people actively work to build the walls of divisiveness based on the perceived friction between their Executive and the Executive of another division only to be left to “eat crow” when their Executive engages in a truce with the Executive of the other division. Worse yet, consider what would happen if the Executive leaves the organization and those who remain now see you as toxic. Sometimes you may feel like your Executive’s behavior lacks the necessary collaborative qualities to ensure his organization is successful in the long run. In this situation ask yourself, what can I do to help bridge the gap? What relationships can I forge to build bridges at lower levels in the organization? Ultimately this will protect your own brand while strengthening the approach of your Executive.

For those looking to develop as an Executive: Achieving your objectives is critical to advancing your career. AND, if you are able to work toward your objectives WHILE keeping relationship as a main priority your path will be much smoother. To be clear, this isn’t an easy task. Most of those whom you come into contact with who have opposing priorities may not be as willing as you are to collaborate. Consider each of these friction points as a way to train for what is to come. Much like musicians practicing that challenging passage over and over to ensure they can do it when the curtain rises, so you will be equipped to to build bridges and protect your organization from the friction they might otherwise feel when you finally do make it to the Executive ranks.

For parents of Toddlers: Just make sure your kid doesn’t throw sand anyone’s face… that really hurts.

“Frankly my dear….” Directness of communication

Toddlers don’t only say the darnedest things… they often say the most embarrassing things. Case in point:

When my brother was young, he was at our grand parent’s house for a day. Important context here is that we grew up in a house that was meticulously kept. He was sitting in the living room playing with some Matchbox cars on the coffee table when he realized the car tires left tracks on the table. Curious, he whipped his finger on the table and realized there was a slight layer of dust which the wheels of the toy car disturbed to make the tracks. He then adjusted his position and pivoted himself toward the kitchen where our grandmother was making dinner and inquired “is anybody gonna dust around here?”

Direct communication for toddlers is a mixture of not understanding the concepts of diplomacy and tact as well as gut instinct. Whether we like it or not, the most embarrassing part of toddlers speaking their mind is that they are usually stating something that is true. Sometimes it is something obvious like a less than meticulously kept home but other times it is something else like the feeling they get from someone… when we get older we call this a “gut reaction”.

So when we think about executives, we can somewhat rule out a deficiency in tact and diplomacy as most executives are experts in this arena. But what out going with your gut and cutting to the chase?

We’ve all seen the hit shows “Shark Tank” and “The Profit” which essentially celebrate the brightest business minds and their ability to cut through the clutter and noise that usually surrounds business to get to the root of a valuation. The reason we like watching these shows is because these executives are able to do something that the rest of us find quite challenging. They can sense the true story using their business sense or “gut”. This sense does nothing without an ability to be direct, ask tough questions and say things no one else is willing to.

The directness of communication that an executive exhibits in both their line of questioning and general assessments is not born out of rudeness (usually) but rather necessity. If they ask the right question and pressure test the right areas they can truly understand the health of what they are assessing and make the best decision for their organization. So what does this translate in to?

For the Executive: It is indeed a fine line between being direct and being rude. Ensure it is the prior and not the later.

For those working with Executives: You should always anticipate the directness. If you go into the conversation with an executive assuming it will be sugar plums and candy canes, you are mistaken and are in for a rude awakening. Arm yourself with the facts and get ready for a brutally honest dialogue.

For those looking to develop as an Executive: Speaking with candor is not easy. We’ve learned to be extremely sensitive to the feelings of those around us and this sensitivity is a good thing however it can get in our way of saying what actually needs to be said. If you are looking to develop as an Executive it will be critical to understand the nuances of when sensitivity is needed and when it is time to be direct… just being able to make this distinction is a great place to start.

For parents of Toddlers: Learn how to apologize to strangers… you’ll be doing it on occasion.