Month: May 2018

LET’S DO THIS: Energy levels

I used to say that my Toddler had two speeds – full sprint and off. When he was awake he was at full sprint in both mind and body. The rest of the time he was sleeping. While there is certainly a difference between the Executive and the Toddler here in the amount of sleep they need, the similarity is unmistakable in that while they are awake, it is full sprint mode. For Executives part of this comes from need. There are so many people who want time with them, they have no choice but to keep a packed schedule. On top of that, each person that sits with them perceives that very moment in time to be a big deal… they are meeting with a powerful executive after all. To be respectful of this perception, the Executive has to be present in these moments. Further more, there are very few things which are being brought to the Executive that are unimportant. If it wasn’t important, it wouldn’t be coming up to the Executive!

Toddlers are similar in that they are present in every moment. For them, everything is interesting since they have so much to learn. Every interaction provides an opportunity to experience something new and absorb an additional piece of information.

So let’s translate this insight into practical application:

For the Executive: Your teams require a lot from you. They expect you to be present and they draw a portion of their motivation based on their perception of you. This means you have to take care of yourself. Eat right, keep your sleep cycle as regular as possible, stay fit, and be diligent about managing your calendar. These actions will further improve your energy level and ensure you are spending that energy on worthwhile activities.

For those working with Executives: It is important to understand the pressures of the Executive you are working with and do your best to support them as opposed to draw from them. This means keep your interactions meaningful and efficient. Ask how you can help. If you have built a strong rapport, you can even inquire as to how they are doing and begin to anticipate their needs.

For those looking to develop as an Executive: I have come to realize that there are two aspects to “energy”. The first is involuntary. Sometimes you are just truly beat and there is nothing you can do about it. Think of sleepless nights and jet lag. The other is voluntary. It is a lack of desire to motivate ones self. While there are many people who suffer from sleep issues and ill effects of international travel, the perceived energy limitations for most people come from the voluntary aspect more often than not. What do I mean by this? If we really think about our “gusto” or intestinal fortitude in most situations, we will often find that those where we lacked the drive or the “hustle” was a mater of choice. Sometimes you have just have to lean in and power through the energy drops and manufacture the energy for yourself. Developing this skill will increase your capacity and unlock new levels of productivity and demonstrated leadership.

For parents of Toddlers: When you feel yourself wearing thin and your energy is waning toddlers can be challenging. It is helpful in these moments to either 1. Make the conscious decision to lean in or 2. If possible, take a step away, have your favorite caffeinated beverage and get back in the game… the team needs you!

NEXT: Attention span

I’m always shocked at how quickly my son changes topic and interest. He will get me to start playing something with him and as soon as I really get into it, he is on to a completely new thing! It’s super annoying when it is something that takes time to set up. By the time I get everything together and ready to go, he is on to something else. The funny thing is that I know this yet I am surprised each and every time it happens. Why is that? It’s because I get engaged in the task. Similar to when someone changes the TV channel right when you get into the show.

But why do Toddlers move on to the new subject? They are bored. They are looking for something else that grabs their attention. As they get older they will find more things interesting about a subject or a task and therefore can stick with it for longer.

So what’s the parallel between toddlers and executives here? There is a fine line between the necessary and unnecessary information. If you cross the line into unnecessary information, you will lose the Executive and much like the Toddler, they will be looking to move on. For the Executive it isn’t about boredom but rather necessity. Of the resources at their disposal, the one most lacking is time and if they feel their time isn’t being spent wisely they will make an adjustment quickly.

It’s important to note that many executives actually have a “tell” when they begin to lose patience with a subject. Some tells are obvious like the Executive standing up and walking around while others are more subtle like an Executive starting to play with their wedding ring. So what can we do? So glad you asked….

For the Executive: Create a strong enough tell that it makes its way through the organization like an urban legend of sorts. Those who know the tell will want to share this knowledge as a badge of honor. Before long, it will make its way into the culture with people saying things like, “she didn’t take off her glasses did she!?” or “If he takes his ring off, just stop talking!” This way you almost step into the role of conductor. Of course don’t abuse the tell. It’s a fine line between being effective and just straight rude.

For those working with Executives: First, always consider your audience. Think about that line between what do they need to know and what might be too much info. The best test here is think about why you are telling them what you are telling them. Everything that is critical to the why stays, everything else can go into backup or an appendix. Second, learn the tell. Sometimes you will accidentally go too far with what info you are providing, especially if you are passionate about your topic. Make sure you monitor the audience. If you start seeing the Executive do that thing they do, wrap it up quickly.

For those looking to develop as an Executive: Time is money… or at least that is how the saying goes. But truthfully, time is a limited resource and as you progress in your career this is one resource that gets strained more and more. Many people wait too long in their career before proactively managing their time. As someone looking to develop as an executive, think about toddlers. When they feel the need to move on, they do. They move on due strictly to want. As an adult, this decision to move on can be predicated on other factors such a priority. Guard your time and be intentional about the things you INVEST your time in.

For parents of Toddlers: Be patient and observe the things your Toddler has a greater attention span for. You may just stumble on the themes of instinct where your Toddler may have the opportunity to excel in the future.

NO?!

What happens when you tell a toddler “no” in response to something they want? The specifics of the response depend on the child but in general you can count on some form of discontent ranging from a pout and a cold shoulder to a full blown fit. I can probably stop here as most of you will be able to draw the parallels to the Executive in your life. So without belaboring the point, let’s cut to the chase and consider the usefulness of this discontent with “no”.

For toddlers it is quite simple. Infants express needs by crying. As a new parent you quickly learn that a crying baby usually means one of three needs… diaper change, food or sleep. However, as the baby becomes a toddler, they begin to have wants that are not needs… just wants. They, of course, don’t know the difference and they try the same tactic… throw some sort of fit and you will get what you need / want. As parents we need to correct this behavior otherwise it will result in the child becoming a spoiled brat (a topic which I will cover in a post called Generation V in a few weeks).

For executives it isn’t this simple. Leading an organization can be quite complex with the stress of balancing the needs of numerous competing stakeholders, fending off competitors that seem to appear out of thin air, maintaining the health and stability of the team while ensuring they are maintaining a strong pace and so on and so forth. Leading successfully in these dynamics requires a certain intestinal fortitude to stay the course and forge ahead in challenging circumstances. If the Executive caves to every “no” they hear, the organization would fall well short of its true capabilities and potentially succumb to the forces of the market. When executives push back on “no” it isn’t necessarily because they are just stubborn but because they believe their team is capable of more.

Think of a personal trainer. We have all heard of or have experienced first hand a trainer or coach that seems to be completely ignorant to the signs of which indicate impending death. You keep thinking, for sure they must know that I am about to die!? The fact of the mater is that they KNOW you are NOT about to die. They KNOW you are capable of more than you yourself are aware of. They are merely there to help you learn what the furthest reaches of your capabilities are. Executives are similar in that they push through the “No” in the hopes of unlocking undiscovered potential.

So what can we learn from this?

For the Executive: Be cognizant of the line. Like a personal trainer, it is possible to push too far. Also, when your team pushes through and finds a new level of performance, celebrate the success!

For those working with Executives: If you are preparing a “no” response to a request, consider the why. If your response to your Executive’s request is “no” you have to be able to eloquently describe your position. If it is just a bad decision that will have negative impacts elsewhere, explain that. Our organizations pay us to understand the nuances of business and if we know of some unintended consequences of a decision, it is our job to bring those to light. That being said, you also better make sure that there is truly nothing you can do to mitigate those potential negative impacts. If the “no” has to do with a lack of resources, simply explain the trade off or ways you can execute the request by temporarily pausing another assignment. Once again, make sure that the resource constraint is real on not just assumed.

For those looking to develop as an Executive: Don’t be afraid to challenge a “no”. Listen to the reasoning and push the team to challenge their own assumptions. You may find that you unlock a new level of potential and your team will be pumped to deliver on what they thought they couldn’t.

For parents of Toddlers: Hold the line! When you say “no” and the Toddler makes a scene, you MUST NOT give in. If you give in to the fit, you have just communicated to the Toddler that their actions are correct and will result in success in the future. The fit trumps the original request. Even if you are questioning what you said “no” to (eg. It’s just not worth the fight), it is no longer about the original request, it is about breaking the behavior. Failure to hold the line here will result in a very spoiled child.

YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!

Typically, when I am in a meeting or listening to a presentation, I do my best to understand the full context of the what is being discussed. I try to get the facts into my head, process them and organize them into a story line. I listen as if I am going to have to reteach whatever it is the presenter is talking about or what is being covered in the meeting. Sometimes I get lost. This frustrates the heck out of me and I try to search for the facts which I might have missed along the way.

Executives and Toddlers alike don’t behave this way. If they don’t understand what you are talking about, it’s your fault, not theirs.

Going back to my last post, “SO MANY QUESTIONS,” I get worn out when my Toddler starts asking too many questions. So I start getting lazy. In my laziness I start not describing things fully. When I do this, it just causes him to ask more questions… and rightfully so. I didn’t explain it well. Ultimately, he just wants to understand and when I leave gaps, he doesn’t care whether it’s his fault or my fault for those gaps, he just knows he wants to understand. The Executive, as you may have guessed, is the same.

When you present to an Executive, they feel a responsibility to understand the topic so they can test it for quality and make a decision if that is what you are seeking. They have a limited amount of time to grasp the topic so they are looking for simplicity. Albert Einstein’s quote, “If you can’t explain something simply, you don’t understand it well enough,” hits the nail on the head here. If the Executive can’t grasp the story, they begin to question your grasp of the topic thereby calling into question your expertise, design and intent of what you are presenting. Executives don’t want you to be clear and concise because they are mean people who don’t like you. They need you to be brief so that they can do THEIR job. But what separates the Execs and Toddlers from everyone else in this area? In most cases… confidence.

When we place the burden on ourselves to understand a poorly delivered message, we do so because we think something is deficient in our processing. We think something is wrong with us. The Executive and the Toddler alike, don’t see it that way. They are confident in their ability to understand and therefore if they aren’t grasping what you are presenting, you must be at fault.

So what can we learn from this?

For the Executive: Continue to seek to understand. For those who fall short, give them feedback… but be clear with the feedback. Just like you expect your team members to explain things simply to you, you need to put in the effort to provide the feedback simply to them.

For those working with Executives: Sometimes we feel pressured to show people how strong our expertise is by going into depth on a topic knowing our audience can’t necessarily follow us there. In fact, some people actually do this on purpose (many college professors come to my mind). This, however, is driven from insecurity and our desire to prove ourselves. Resist the urge. Einstein was a pretty smart dude and if he favored simplicity, it’s safe to say that he was right.

For those looking to develop as an Executive: If you suddenly find yourself not understanding a presentation or a topic, do your best to hone in one where the gap is and identify the right question to ask to see if the presenter can fill the gap. If they do, great! If they can’t, you just uncovered a flaw in their logic and your question might cause the team to rethink their approach and create a better product or solution.

For parents of Toddlers: When the questions start coming, get on eye level with the little guy or gal, and lean in on really explaining the topic well. In the end, you’ll find that the exercise of doing so actually helps you understand the topic even better than before. If you can’t, ask Siri ; )